This is a tire fire
the tire fire burns eternal
- 2026Tariffs up 5x. Making America pay again.
- active directoryNetBIOS: 15 characters of permanent regret
- airbnbDisrupting hospitality and uptime simultaneously
- american craftSmall-batch, locally-sourced, thoroughly unmaintainable
- australiaEverything is trying to kill your uptime
- awsAmazon's infinite money extraction service
- byodBring your own device. Also your own vulnerabilities.
- cafepressThe password reset email contains your password
- cfengineMark Burgess was right. Nobody listened correctly.
- chefToo many cooks in the infrastructure kitchen
- claudeMake the add-to-cart button blue. Done: I updated the load-bearing color token — along with four load-bearing consumers — and spawned three agents.
- codex847 tests passed. The users table did not.
- confluenceThe page exists. Search can't find it. The owner left in 2021. Knowledge: managed.
- copyleftFree as in please consult legal before shipping
- cryopsFive tools, zero sources of truth, one hailmary ACL
- devopsYou build it, you break it, you cry about it
- dnsIt's always DNS. Always.
- dockerContainerizing your problems since 2013
- githubBad news: GitHub is down. Good news: GitHub status page is up!
- grokTens of thousands of nonconsensual images. Safety rails sold separately.
- ibmPivoting since 1993, still winning government contracts
- incident managementManaging incidents by creating more incidents
- infrakitThe infrastructure abstraction graveyard
- jess frazelleSomeone who actually ships things
- jira25,000 plugins. Still can't click anything. Please file a ticket.
- linearDeleted Confluence. Forgot to replace the wiki. But look at those keyboard shortcuts.
- logrotateJust makes more smoke for you to grep
- aboutWhy tire fires are the right metaphor for ops
- microservicesDistributed monoliths with extra steps
- monitoringWatching everything burn in real-time
- motivationThe ops motivation experience
- nicolas cageThe spirit animal of ops
- nodejsI/O is non-blocking, your ops team is not
- notionStill loading. Still no offline mode. Have you tried adding another database?
- openjdkIt's all equal. Right?
- opsWhere hope goes to die
- puppetConfiguration management with strings attached
- rvmThe wrapper that manages the thing that manages the thing
- s3Simple storage service. Simply not working.
- salesforceForty clicks to update one field. That's how you know it's enterprise.
- serverlessNo servers. Just someone else's servers.
- simon and czarfunkelHello czarkness my old friend
- sk8 or dieKickstart files as a form of creative expression
- sysadmin dayThe one day a year ops gets acknowledged
- systemdDoing everything so you don't have to understand anything
- trumpdaysThe production system that cannot come down for maintenance
- vmworldThe cert that now costs $80k per year to use
- weblogicLogic not included
- well actuallyTechnically correct, contextually useless
- windowsBlue screens of death in the cloud
- zoomAccidental critical infrastructure, approved by nobody in IT